Theth or Bust!

The brave adventurers (or the six idiots!): Yours Truly, Elder Foulk, Elder Flack, Elder Turley, Elder Shupe (retired lawyer from Oceanside, CA, here with his wife as YSA Outreach missionaries--she opted out of the adventure), and Elder Oakey

Theth is a small village in Albania’s only national park, and I’ve wanted to see it ever since we arrived. Most Albanians have never been there, but I had read that it is spectacularly beautiful. It's in the Albanian Alps, in the remote northern section of the country. Religion survived in this part of Albania because people in the mountains were unreachable by the invaders, whether Muslim or Communist.

Knowing that Liz wouldn't be interested in the drive to get there (mainly for the lack of sit-down toilets), I thought I'd go while Liz was in the U.S. for Greg’s wedding and Erin and Jason’s baby. With me were Elder Shupe, the assistants, and the office elders. We left Monday morning, August 31, from Tirana at a little after 6AM according to plan. Our plan was 1.5 hours to Shkoder, 3 hours to Theth, a couple of hours exploring there, 3 hours back to Shkoder, then back to Tirana by 6PM. But nothing else on this trip went as planned. We arrived back at the mission offices the following morning around 3AM, minus the mission van. I'll explain.

Which is better for transportation to Theth?

We drove to Shkoder, the most northern city where we have missionaries, and made this our departure point. We decided that we would take a loop around Theth, since the excellent map we had showed that you could approach Theth from the south and return toward the west.

That way!

The roads were marked as "secondary" roads, so we assumed that a Volkswagon Sharan van would be able to use them. This turned out to not be true, as we just didn't have enough clearance to keep from scraping the undercarriage of the vehicle. There was a point shortly after our first encounter with a rough spot (where the other 5 got out of the car to let the car ride a little higher off the ground), when we briefly discussed turning around and trying another way. But, we figured that the roads had to get better, because someone had told us that there was a paved road all the way to Theth. We discovered that this was not true!

One of many roadside memorials marking the spot where people lost their lives on the road.

We drove for hours, and hours, and hours, never seeing another vehicle (should have been a clue), but we did see farmers along the road and young men playing in the small river we were driving along. We'd ask if we were on the right road to Theth, and they’d say that we were but that we were insane for thinking we could go in the van. I was driving very slowly and dodging the big rocks as much as possible.

Testing to see if this shallow puddle is what is looks like, and not a giant hole.

After about 5 hours of this we stopped for lunch and asked a young man “How far to Theth?” He told us it was another 5 hours! But since we were past the point of no return, we decided to keep going.

We stopped fairly often for pictures (amazingly beautiful mountains, and valleys), and for traversing ancient suspension bridges made of sticks and twigs over the river (scary!).

Then things started going a little wrong. We lost one hub cap, then another. Then we had a flat tire on the left front which took about 30 minutes to change. Fortunately, we had a spare! Someone (I think it was me) wrote in the dust collected on the rear window "Theth or bust". Then we asked Elder Shupe to offer a prayer to get us there and back home safely, which he did. But, I remember that he didn't bless the car to function well.

After more hours of driving we left the river and started going up switchbacks over the mountain. The road became rougher and rougher. We slowed down even more. The others got out to go over the roughest parts even more often. Some were just walking at this point. Around 6PM (I had been driving for 12 hours straight), I told everyone to get back in the car because we were down the mountain and things were looking better. Beside that we had just seen a monstrous wolf leap in front of the car and it nearly filled the entire field of view! We were doing well and we thought we saw paved road ahead (a mirage!). I was going a little too fast--maybe 15 miles per hour, and the oil pan took a direct hit from a boulder sticking up in the road. Immediately the engine started making an awful racket and I realized the oil pan was gone so I shut off the car. We figured we were about 10 miles from Theth so we pushed the car off the road and started hiking. We were in the middle of nowhere. Fortunately, fortunately, fortunately--we had cell service, so we called the elders in Shkoder and asked them to hire a bus to come pick us up in Theth. They called back later and told us that it would take them a little over 3 hours to get there, but they were on their way.

Hiking by the light of the moon

The nearly full moon came up early, and we started hiking in the moonlight toward the town. Elder Shupe and I kept telling the elders to make sure the old people were in front as the wolves always eat the stragglers. After several hours of hiking we saw the village of Theth ahead. Off on our right, on the other side of the river we saw a stone kulla or tower. According the the ancient code of Kanun, someone involved in blood feud is safe if living inside a kulla, but may be killed anywhere else in the countryside. We saw a few stone houses, but no lights were on. We continued hiking for about an hour and a half and finally saw a few cars parked in a corral-like structure, and inside there were a few stick huts with small tables. We found the proprietor and bought some orange sodas.

Elder Turley then remembered that Sokol, a member of the church who lives in Shkoder during the winter, lives in Theth in the summer. We called Sokol and he said he would come to take us to his home. Sokol told us to start walking toward his house and he would meet us halfway. The owner of the outdoor Locale (bar, cafe), directed us where to go and we started off. I should now set the scene. Theth, the village, consists of just a few stone houses scattered randomly about a fairly large area, and none of them had lights on or seem to be inhabited. However, according to custom and the code of Kanun, we could have knocked on any door and would have been welcomed and invited to spend the night, as honoring the guest--even if he’s astranger--is the highest moral value in the code.

We found a path that was illuminated by the moon, and we began walking. There was total silence and stillness, except for the sound of the small river a few hundred yards away. As we walked by an ancient stone church, someone started throwing stones at a steel drum not too far from us and we got a little freaked out! We called out "Who's there?" But there was no answer. We wondered if it was just some funny boys trying to scare us Americans, but it happened several times. We walked back to investigate but no one appeared. We resumed walking in the direction we had been headed. Finally, after about a quarter of a mile we found Sokol. He's in his 30's and is wearing a traditional mountain man's white wool cap. He says it's a symbol for the kulla, and it's rather shaped like a tower. So in single file we followed Sokol as he led us to his house. The fences around the corn fields didn’t have gates but had steps that we climbed up and down to the other side. There were three or four of these fences to navigate over in the dark but the moonlight helped a lot. The corn in the fields was very high, and it was eerie to be walking through the towering corn in complete silence with the moonlight streaming through. I couldn't help but wonder if the wolves hunt at night. Since I was last in the line I wouldn't have been missed.

We finally arrived at Sokol's ancient stone house and he set up a couple of benches for us outside. We surmised that he was embarrassed to invite us in because it sounded as though there was a drunken party going on inside. Sokol's pretty, petite wife joined us, brought us something to drink, and we sat there talking and asking them questions. It was getting chilly and we started to shiver due to all the exertion from walking, and because we just had on thin short-sleeve shirts.

Sokol's family home and kulla

We were interested in the kulla right next to his house, and Sokol explained that it was for blood feuds and was built by his family about 800 years ago. We asked for a tour and he explained that there were no lights, but he was happy to take us so we used our cell phone lights to see our way. The Kulla is a three story tower with crude holes cut in two floors, and ladders attached to enable one to climb up to the other floors. On one wall of the first floor we saw a photograph of Sokol's father and grandparents. They looked just like him. We spent probably 30 minutes exploring the kulla, and by the time we had climbed down, the private van (with high clearance undercarriage) had arrived from Shkoder with two elders, and Toma and Adriana who are members from Shkoder and also are Sokol’s brother and sister-in-law.

The members had come to show the driver where Sokol lives. It was around 10PM. We enjoyed a fast and furious ride over terrible roads with switchbacks and hairpin curves, but no one really cared because we were too exhausted to worry about going over the side. We got to Shkoder after 3 hours, then had to talk the driver into driving us back to Tirana. He agreed--for a price--and picked up a friend to help him drive so he wouldn’t fall asleep. We arrived back home around 3AM, not knowing if we would ever see our wimpy VW Sharan van again.

Roan, our good friend in Tirana who takes care of facilities and keeps us out of trouble, is well connected and called the head of the Police Directorate in Tirana to ask for help. He in turn called the Police in Shkoder who sent a man out to guard our wimpy van overnight. The next day a tow truck driver from Shkoder made his way out to our van. He spent many hours and had trouble finding it but eventually did, and then towed it back to Shkoder. We then asked them to bring it to Tirana, whatever the price. The next day Roan and I drove to the Tirana police station and delivered $500 to cover all the towing. I had been told that our van was at the Porsche VW dealer here, but since I hadn’t seen it, I had to take it on faith that it was.

All in all, it was an amazing adventure not to be forgotten.

We'll do it again when you come and visit! I know the way now.

Marty